Born Again Christian

Yo



You remember when your mommy used to take you to church



And tie your shoes so tight until your ankles hurt?



Everybody in the spirit, me myself I'm bored



But mama spanked me in my head and I was "Praise the Lord!"



When the choir started singin all you seen was gals



But there was one particular girl I wanted to be my pal



Her name was Jenny, she never used to come outside



Cause her parents were rich and real dignified



When she was a regular on Sunday school



I said "Ma, I wanna join," she said (shut up, fool)



So I ran to the preacher and I begged to serve



He said (you in Sunday school, you must be out yo mind!



You is the baddest little thing that the church done seen



You get suspended every month, you're too bad, Raheem!)



So I went down on my knee and said, "Holy Christ



Thy is the ???? and the eternal light"



So he looked at me a minute and he said (Yeah cool



But I'm tellin ya, my mama didn't raise no fool



First rule and regulation if you step out of line



I'ma throw you in the street on your narrow behind!)



So I got up off the ground and I was "Yeah man, peace"



Started minglin with [Names] and Denise



As I mingled with the ladies Jenny walked on by



I was stuck between "hello," "how you're doin" and "hi"



But I finally said somethin and the girl said (hey..)



I musta prayed all week for the next Sunday



Now the Sunday finally came and I was in my seat



When the teacher wrote on the board 'Raheem, do not speak'



I ain't really come for speakin, so I ain't get vexed



Until she started askin questions and mine was next



Jenny lookin at me, man, I gotta get this right



The teacher said (class, we're out of time, you can finish tonight)



So I caught up with the girl and said, "Hey, I'm new



But I'd really like to spend a little time with you



Maybe candle light dinner or a movie or two



Or maybe just the wild thing," she said (not with you



I'm a church-going girl, you gotta marry me first)



I said, "What? You ain't old enough to carry a purse!"



She said (My mama always told me that's the thing with men



If you let em get it once, you never see em again)



Well, I asked her for her number but her mom came in



And said (Jenny, don't you let me see you talking to him



He's a crooked ?????, ain't gon' be jack)



I was kinda insulted but I ain't sweat that crap



Well, we made it to the church, the preacher started to preach



I fell asleep cause he was speakin that same old speech



Started dreamin 'bout Jenny, boy, and all I seen



Was me and her in full effect with a little Raheem



Now the Sunday after that I'm in the mood for sex



I said, "Jenny, skip the church, so we can rub some necks"



(Ah-ah, I'm a virgin and I'll always be



And it's guys like you that make it hard for me)



Cut the frontin, baby doll, you know you want some of this



So put your Bible on the ground and give the Father a kiss



(Kiss you? A-ah, you must be sick in your head)



Well, forget the kissin, baby, take it straight to the bed



Cause I'm the real enchilada when the heat gets warm



And I been waitin on your body since the day I was born



No need to rush because we still got time



And I'ma give you 30 seconds just to show you that I'm



The one perfect for the job of helpin you to get off



Any other you meet, I guarantee he'll be soft



No stamina in his body, he ain't know how to ride



I can even give a ??massage?? let you stand outside



(Ooh - Raheem, you crazy and you make me sick)



I got the perfect thing for you, and this is it



Throw away your negativity and have some fun



Cause who knows when this is over and your life is done



If you really go to heaven or you're goin to hell



Are you ready now, baby? (Well, I might as well)



12 o'clock Monday evening, that's the time of the crime



But she on the 4th floor and that's a ladder to climb



When I got up to the ladder she was up there sleep



Snorin louder than a mother countin many a sheep



I said, "Damn!" so I tapped her glass



And tried to wake the girl but nearly bust my -



Well, I went home mad cause I never did get none



But that ain't nothin cause I gotta meet the next one



Before I go there's one thing I'ma mention



Never mess around with a girl if she a Born Again Christian